Servant v. Slave Pt.II

Dear friends,

In my first post, I was writing from a more raw and viscerally emotional point of view when it came to my personal perspective on how believers, both leaders and followers, look at the role of the "staff" they have in their ministries. In writing from the POV, I failed to differentiate what I felt the difference was between being a servant and being a slave. I covered it briefly, but very clearly.

Gary, in one of his comments, makes a good point and does some of the footwork for me:

How can you be a servant without being a slave?
Maybe I missed something in your post, but don't you have to *change* your boss into a partner if you are also going to be a partner? I'm just saying that I don't think you can become a "partner" or equal laborer unless it is first agreed upon. In other words, you can't simply just change yourself. Good luck in getting the boss to step out from behind the podium for a moment.The only difference between servant and slave is attitude. So lets say you cleaned toilets (although not originally a part of your "job description") not because you were paid but because you knew *someone* had to do it. You've gone from slave of expectations to servant of need.

The fundamental difference between being a servant or a slave is the surrender of one's rights. When I went to NBBC, I basically "surrendered" to do the work of God. At the time, I felt that He was leading me there to train for that task. Every step of the way, I approached God and surrendered what most people would consider their rights - the right to say what I wanted to do with my life, the right to earn a certain standard of living, the right to the American Dream, etc.

All theology views of freewill aside, I woke up every day surrendering my life to do what Christ would have for me in his service. Several years later, I woke up in a ministry, ready to serve. For me, my life was a freewill offering to God and his people. In my mind, I would partner with people to do the work of God, seek the will of God, through the spirit of God.

What I quickly found was that the basic mindset of the leadership, and the congregation by proxy, was I was not partnered with them - I worked for them. While my offering was the surrendering of my rights to God, their offering was seen in my paycheck, thus they surrendered money as their offerings and I was expected to serve my portion and do theirs also. This mindset was propagated by the leadership by making all church related events, big or small, required because I was "getting paid". Now the spiritual shareholders didn't have to be held to the same standard, because they had already paid their penances in the form of tithe and school bills.

A fellow teacher of mine and I went before the deacon board to ask to be ordained because we felt that it was something we wanted/needed to do. We wanted the church blessing, not the one where you have a board grill you...Anyhow, they deliberated a while and then called us into the room where they had met. Basically, they denied us and said that they would consider it after six months of observing us doing *a laundry list of spiritual activity*. Being the obedient servants we were back then, we nod and left, but inside, we were ready to come unglued.

Why? First, they were asking us to do something that we were already doing, not because we were told to, but because we had surrendered to do so. Second, they were asking us to do something that 80% of the men in that room hadn't done once in that year. Finally, we realized that if they weren't convinced of our seriousness and sacrifice for Christ then, they never would be.

Together, we realized that we had in the eyes of the people around us, become slaves, and had probably never been seen as servants. We were expected to do the work of God for the people, not with them. We were to seek the will of the deacon board, not search together for the will of God. The Spirit was not to drive us to serve, it was to be our paychecks. To not do them meant we were obviously not in the will of God.

My friend and I went to our office and just shook our heads. Were not these things done because we were part of the Body of Christ, not because we made less than minimum wage working at a church? It was the beginning of the end for me. Thankful , they decided they didn't need me any more the following year.

Servants surrender their rights. Slaves have them stripped from them.

Servants find joy in serving those who God has called them to minister to and with. Slave do it because it is their jobs. They carry not only their own burdens, but the burdens of those around them by themselves.

Amanda and I live a certain way because we love one another. It is no great burden for me to hand my entire check over to her because we are forging a shared life together. We are on a path together that requires both of us work together to build our family. I serve her and she serves me and together we serve our children.

Consider, however, if we were to be divorced. All the basic elements are still there...me, her, finances, the kids...one thing is missing though - surrender. She probably still gets my paycheck, but now I am working for her, not with her. In essence, I am her slave.

While it should be understood that everyone in the Body should see themselves as servants, sadly, it is often not the case. The addage that 10% of the people do 90% of the work is true and while it seems that this ratio is accepted by the Church, it shouldn't be. The 10% become slaves to the 90%.

Gary was right that the difference is attitude. I want to be a servant, but I choose not to be a slave. Thankfully, I believe I am part of a church where the leadership understands this and I can't begin to tell you how refreshing it is.


Humbly seeking to serve once again,

Jay

The Muppet Show

I am a huge fan of the Muppet Show. I always have been. Long before VCR's came out, I used to use my tape recorder and tape the audio from the tv and listen to it over and over. I have seen all the movies and television specials.

I like the Muppets, but I'm not so fond of it when my life seems like backstage at the show.

I feel a lot like Gonzo lately. I'm a Weirdo that no one understands and no matter how hard I try, my trumpet always blows up.

Amanda, I guess would be Kermit. Running around behind the scenes, trying to hold the show together.

Emma, is clearly Ms. Piggy. She has a bigger than life personality and the glam to go with it.

Mikayla, well...I'm sure everyone knows who she is.

Forgiveness vs. Mercy

First, I want you to read this - Adultery 2.0

During our Wednesday night meeting at church, we discussed the 51st Psalm. The Psalm is basically David repenting of his sin with Bathsheba after the prophet Nathan makes him aware of his sin. In discussing this, I asked the question:

In a situation like adultery, should someone ask for forgiveness or mercy?

We talked about this, both during and after church, and Pastor said some things that I thought were very insightful...mostly because he agreed with me.

First, that forgiveness only help the person asking for forgiveness. It essentially does nothing for the offended.

Second, I brought up the fact that while mercy (unmerited favor) and forgiveness are linked, they are, practically, two separate things. In biblical terms, it would seem that Scriptures teach us that we are to forgive "seventy times seven" and "to forgive, because we have been forgiven". Mercy, however, says that I ask for something I don't deserve. I understand if you choose to not give it, but I must ask regardless. My responsibility is before God and then before man...I have control over the asking, but not the results and must except what comes as part of the consequences of my sin.

Lastly, for someone to demand forgiveness is an act of arrogance. The offender is allowed to rape, pillage, and plunder for years, but is able to ask for forgiveness and all should be well. And, if the offended, who has had their entire life ripped from them and stripped nearly of everything they held dear, responds in anger, frustration, and hurt...your response is:

If you think for one moment that my offense against you exceeds my offense to Christ Himself, you’ve highly deceived yourself. That being said, if Christ can and will forgive even the vilest of sinners, what makes you better than Him. Why do you persist in taking His position on His throne and casting such judgment on me? Do you not think He is quite capable of taking care of that Himself? Where’s your humility in it all. Have you thanked God that He spared you of a similar path because it could have been you just as easily. Christ said if a man even thinks it in his heart, he’s guilty of it.

While this seems like the Baptist/Fundamentalist party line, their response tells me that they don't get it.

While what happened was a hideous act, how much better would have it for that man to simply say...

I ask for mercy for my sins against you. I know that I have taken much from you and I realize there is nothing I can do to restore to you what has been lost. I have been humbled before men and God and I realize that I deserve your anger and scorn. I plead for your mercy and I realize that while God may forgive me, I understand if you cannot. I took what was not mine for almost two years...I cannot expect for you to forgive me...

As we were leaving for the night, Pastor said something to me that summed it all up. To essentially demand forgiveness the way he has, is an arrogant and manipulative manner to approach the situation, which he felt spoke to the individuals mindset and lack of understanding of his sin. He felt those were not the words of someone with a broken spirit and a contrite heart(Ps51:17).

I wholeheartedly agree.

Servant vs. Slave

Over the years, I have taken an interest in what I call "secondary ministers". My definition of "secondary ministers" is that of youth pastors, Christian school teachers, Asst. Pastors and sometimes pastors of smaller churches.

Why the interest? Well, basically because I was one. Ten years ago, I graduated from Bible college and stepped into my first ministry. I was hired on as a youth pastor and secondarily, as a teacher in the Christian school. I was paid a ridiculously small salary for the job, but that was fine, because I was a servant. That was what I learned in college to be and I truly believed that God would provide(and He did, time and again.).

So, I started ministering. Soon, I started noticing a pattern. While my job description (which was understood, not on paper) said I was a youth pastor and teacher, I suddenly became janitor, grounds keeper, and a myriad of other things. Why? Well, because that was what I was paid to do...right? I had to be in church when the doors were open, go calling on Thursday nights(basically me and pastor) and several other churchy things that came up.

After about a year and a half of this, I came to a conclusion, I was no longer a servant. I had become a slave and basically, a tool.

I was a tool to the ministry leaders(pastor/deacons) and a slave to the paying establishment(the congregation). Let me explain this a little more. The pastor, and I love him dearly, but philosophically we disagreed on what my role should be, looked at me as a means of getting ministry done. Not as a partner in ministry and certainly not anyone with authority, thus, I became no different from a hammer or a screwdriver in a tool box. Just a means to an end.

I was a slave to the congregation because they felt that because they were paying my salary that it excused them from service. So, service became slavery and duty, which quickly became resentment on my part.

However, I don't blame either one of them, because I don't think they know any better.

Do you ever wonder why some many people have come out of Fundamental churches feeling beat on and used? This is one of the reasons why.

Here is the basic premise that people need to understand. Pastors, listen up. People in the pews, listen up.

We are fellow laborers, not slaves to accomplish your vision for the church and ministry. We work together based on being the Body, not paychecks.

Ask anybody, paid or unpaid, that works with youth if they have had a parent yell at them because their kid is in trouble. Teachers? Had a parent hammer you because a child is failing?

We are fellow labors, working together to mentor and educate your children. We are not babysitters or miracle workers. It is not our job to raise your kids.

We work together, but the responsibility is yours. You want your kids to learn? Help them at home by creating a rapport with their teachers and finding out how together you can bring your children along. Read to them, help them with their homework, volunteer.

Don't blame the teacher.

Want your children to know who God is? Pray with them. Read the Bible together as a family. Love your neighbor in front of them. Flesh out what you say you believe daily.

Don't expect the Sunday School teacher, youth pastor, or children's worker to do your job.

We are fellow laborers.

A good friend of mine told me a story about when he was pastoring that a man confronted him about not having Sunday School for the children. Their current building size, and a few other reasons, really restricted what the church was able to do, so they had opted not have SS at that time. The man was angered because, "How would the children learn about God?" if they didn't have SS.

My friend told him, "Well, you will just have to teach them."

The man we so angry at his response that a fight almost broke out.

We are fellow laborers.

Not tools. Not slaves.

When we start acting like the Body of Christ and not the Toolbox of Ministry, we are going to see God do great things in our lives and in the lives of others. When we become partnered with our educational and spiritual leaders, we are going to see our childrens lives change and growth occur.

Someone asked me if I would ever consider going back to that ministry again and without a moments hesitation, I answered "yes!" Why? I love them. My life was changed because of my time there. We both had glaring imperfections, but our hearts were knit together. However, if I did, things would be different. I don't mind being a servant...actually, I love it. But, I will NEVER be a slave again.

the Five

1. Next week I will be heading down to Lansing for training for Speedway. After that, I will officially be a manager. Up till now, I have been "he who does all the heavy lifting".

2. I skipped church in Grayling and went to a service with my Pastor in Burt Lake. Pastor Wagner and his family are on vacation this week at a cabin Cheboygan and we met up at my former church and enjoyed the service. The Wagner's came in late, so Pastor Chatfield didn't have a chance to meet them. He greeted me from the pulpit and said, "Good to see the Mertes' here today. He must have decided to come see a handsome preacher this week..." George Bradstreet and I almost blew up trying not to laugh. I miss Burt Lake. Our family has some good friends there.

3. Emma turned 5 yesterday. She is turning into such a big girl. She is in the bedroom right now watching Season 1 of Full House and working on her letters.

4. I go to bed at 8:00 pm now. That is almost before my kids do.

5. I have a bad habit of singing 80's sitcom themes at work. I am beloved by some, who join in and sing along, and cursed by others, who apparently don't have any sitcom soul.

"Blood and Bloody Ashes"

Robert Jordan died today.

"Suck It, Jesus!"

Has anyone else heard about the comments that Kathy Griffin made at the Emmy's? If you haven't, here they are:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MiJY5QiDwgs

So, what do you think?

Are you fired up? Does that bother you? I mean, she told Jesus to and I quote "Suck it!"

Or, did you think it was funny?

Here is my take. We, as believers, tell Jesus to "Suck It" every time we willfully disobey. Why should we expect someone who is a professed atheist to do less.

I know the fundamentalist line and I still believe it, but I think it is hypocritical to condemn Kathy for doing what she does best as a comedian...offending and making people laugh.

Angie's Wedding

I wanted to get to the tale that is my sister's wedding, but it lacked the visuals that I wanted to put down. Now, thanks to a family member, I have such pictures.

Accompanying me on my journey was my wife, my daughter, and my parental units, Harold and Lois. We left for Traverse City Thursday morning and flew out of Cherry Capital Airport at around 11. The first flight was a big deal to the girls because neither of them had flown before. Emma handled it well and the novelty quickly wore off for her. Amanda's stomach had a little problem with the flight, but she was a trooper.

We arrived at the Cincinnati/N. Kentucky Airport at around 1:00. Our flight, was at 3, so we looked around and ate. 3:00 came and went. Our flight to Philly was pushed back...4...5...6...7...8...cancelled. By the way, when we were on the way back, I was in the airport bathroom stall and someone slid their foot under my stall. Then, a piece of paper was down there, so I tried to pick it up...

We ended up flying out the next day at 3:00 and got into Philadelphia at around 6. Renting a car, we headed for Reading, which was where the wedding was. We arrived at the hotel late and Angie showed with Sean and we headed out for a bit to eat.

Saturday morning, we whisked the girls off to get their hair done and then, it was off to the wedding.

I have to tell you, I have been to a lot of weddings, but I think this was the coolest one ever...I think I enjoyed it more than my own. Is that bad? Anyhow, not only was it relaxed, beautifully decorated, and had great food, there were several family members that I don't get to see often that were there. Sure, they are older, but with age comes experience and lots of years of whooping it up at parties. I would like to see all of us who were at the wedding and my Uncle Fred's family have a rendezvous at Cedar Point for a family blowout.

Anyhow, I want to get to the pictures:

Here is our professional flower girl.

Angie, It is good to see your wonderful smile again and you were possibly the most beautiful bride I have ever seen.

Sean, welcome to the family. Please take care of her, she is something special, but I think you already know that.

Congratulations. We love you and wish you the best.